Being content with who you are

 

A couple weeks ago, I found myself sitting in my living room wondering what's next? I was a few weeks away from graduating when I had a sudden realization that the one thing I always wanted to do (football), I had no interest in doing anymore. Luckily I have embraced another passion of mine which is speaking about mental health the only issue I had was knowing what I was going to do with this passion. 

My whole life, I have found myself feeling the pressure to be strong 24/7. As a young black man I always felt like I was unable to show weakness, not to embrace my emotions, and just get on with it. I lived with this lie for many years, but at times it helped me get through my most challenging moments. However, moving to the US changed my perspective in a way that I'll never forget. Being isolated from my friends and family back home was my biggest challenge while I was there. Through isolation, I was able to challenge my emotions and grow in unexpected ways. It also allowed me to discover my love for writing, I spent most of my time writing poems and journaling my experiences. This was a bittersweet experience because for the first time I was able to express what I felt, but because I had suppressed this side of me, I had no idea what to write whenever I picked up a pen. Through practice, I was able to improve and acquire a skill I was never going to let go of. My experience abroad really opened my eyes to the fact that there is more to life than we can imagine. Whilst I was out there I also met a number of amazing teammates, friends, and coaches who inspired me,  I was able to share my experiences with them and likewise they were able to do the same thing. This made me realize how similar we all were without even realizing it and that we all have a story to tell. 

Speak out: Speaking to someone that looked nothing like me and was from a different background than me was the best decision I had ever made. I was able to learn a lot from them and really change my perspective of life. My journey has been filled with many setbacks, but I have made the conscious choice to not let allow it to stop me from pushing forward. Trusting people with what you're going through can be difficult and sometimes the subject may not be easy to discuss which is understandable. However, we are very fortunate to have counseling, therapy and great support systems (i.e, family and friends) available to us, so it is important that we take advantage of it. The truth is that embracing your pain and sharing your experiences would set you free and ultimately ease some of your burden. 

All of us have suffered a great deal, but we should never let that discourage us, don't be hard on yourself. There are still a lot of things to figure out, no one said life would be easy. I know it can be confusing now a days, especially with social media. We see people who look like us and come from the same place as us living successfully, but do not be quick to judge; they are humans too, they too have moments when they feel discouraged. It is critical that we keep striving forward, believe in ourselves and pick ourselves up. A simple word of encouragement can really have an impact on someones life, check in with people as much as you can because you really don't know what someone is dealing with. Someone you know may be on the brink of giving up and they want is someone to see them for who they are and not the decisions they make. 

Embracing your hardships: At times we may find ourselves asking Why me? Why did I have to suffer? I get it but you have to realize the journey you are on is unique to you. Your time is coming and if you keep at it, doors will open for you. Don't let hard times makes you give up on your dream or your hopes of living a successful life. 

Approximately three weeks ago, on a Sunday morning that I really felt discouraged. I realized that I had lost significant faith in God and where I was going, I had stopped reading the Bible, going to church, and allowed everything I was dealing with to consume me. Ultimately this made me feel like I wasn't good enough. On this day, all that was running through my head was why this happened to me. I felt that everything I had worked so hard for had been for nothing. However, I decided I wasn't going to feel this way any longer, I searched through Youtube and found a sermon hosted by TD Jakes and Steven Furtick. Interestingly enough they talked about how our crushing leads to soaring. Meaning that it is sometimes necessary for us to be crushed (i.e, let down, disappointed, not reaching our exceptions) in order to soar (fly). Initially, I didn't get it, but the more I meditated on their words, the more I realized that I was exactly where God wanted me to be.  Sometimes, our thoughts can be limited because we allow ourselves to be prisoners within the boundaries of our comfort zone. Deep this, If  someone said their goal was to be their own boss, but they stayed in the comfort of your own home, how do they expect to achieve your goals? They refuse to branch out build connections with people, or fail to listen to advice from their loved ones, how then can they expect to move forward?  It's just like keeping friendships or staying in a relationship that you know wasn't right for you. This not only would disrupt your growth but you would never realize your self-worth and how valuable you are. One thing that I am very grateful for is that I was able to learn this at the time I did. Through my experiences I now know it is one of my purposes to make a difference in my community and for our generation. Before I can do this, I must first embrace who I am, choose to love myself, but most importantly embrace my crushing so I can get what I know I deserve.

Through my writing, I hope to continue to inspire and help someone in need. I'm not always perfect but I will continue to try to be the best version of me as long as I live! 

Thanks for reading, if you would like to share your thoughts and opinions please do! Link for the Sermon below if your interested!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CzP23Zti-YI&t=3003s